- Pain: 3/10
- Inconvenience: 9/10 (I can *almost* use a straw now!)
I didn’t fall asleep until 4:30 this morning. That was a bad move because I don’t want to become sick on top of this cannot-feel-my-face condition. It felt like my mouth was trying to break out of my face. It wasn’t painful, it was just uncomfortable. Drugs, drugs, drugs, some are good, some are bad… but right now, they’re all good. All of them.
By the way, in case you didn’t think I was a drug-addict before (which I wasn’t), here is my daily routine of meds right now:
- Novamoxin: Anti-biotic to prevent infection since I can’t clean my mouth — 10 mL 4x/day
- Dimetapp: Decongestant (since I can’t blow my nose) — 5 mL 2x/day
- Ibuprofen: Kills the swelling (had to get the kid’s version because I need it in liquid form) — 30 mL 4x/day
- Codeine: Painkiller — 10 mL 4x/day
- Perichlor: To rinse my mouth out — 5 mL 2x/day
- Ipratropium: Nasal spray (again, since I can’t blow my nose) — 2 sprays/nostril 2x/day
Speaking of chubby faces, I can feel both of my cheeks again! Now I’m only numb in the narrow strip of my face reaching from the bottom of my eyes down to the bottom of my chin. However, to compliment this decrease in swelling, my face has started bruising. But I’m a guy, so this just makes me look tough.
It looks like my weight loss is beginning to peak. I’ve officially lost 21 pounds now–10.8% of my bodyweight. At this rate, I’ll be 0 lbs by about May 10th. I think that’s abnormally high though, because I was attempting to put weight on just before I went in for surgery. I’m naturally 175 lbs–I went into surgery at 194 lbs–and now I’m sitting at 173 lbs.
My brother and little nephew stopped by yesterday afternoon to say hi. We chatted for about 5 minutes or so. The poor little boy couldn’t understand a word I was saying and he was really confused as to why my mouth wasn’t moving but I was still able to make sounds. Then boredom evidently set in: “Okay, can we go now? I want to go to the hockey game.” Career as a ventriloquist? I just think I might.
And guess what! I can smile now! You can see my beautiful, flashy grin in today’s mugshot. I think I look like a freaky, circus clown–I’d even be scared if I saw that in the middle of the night!
Well, apparently it’s 13 ºC today, so I’m going to go outside. Dad and I are going to head downtown to pick my car up since I’m finally up for driving. I hope this goes well. I can see the headlines already:
“Man crashes into all-you-can-eat buffet while steering with his knees and using both hands in an attempt to drink from a syringe during his drive down Whyte Ave. Irony prevails.”
A big thank you to my friend who kindly forgot I was incapacitated and invited me out partying last night. I really do appreciate all these reminders that I can’t do jack squat right now.