- Pain: 1/10
- Inconvenience: 5/10
That photo was taken when I was… oh, around 3 years old I think? I can’t really remember. All I can recall is that my bowtie squeaked when you squeezed it. As adorable as I was in my pink dress shirt and navy blue suspenders, I still had several problems. I wore bifocals since I fought my way out of the womb due to an astigmatism in 1 of my eyes. And, of course, I had the infamous class 3 occlusion. What a treasure I must have been–a newborn with old-man eyes and a botched face! My parents were so proud.
I spent some time with a friend the other day who underwent lower jaw surgery over Christmas of last year. It’s been approximately 3 and a half months since his operation. He looks great, his face is a lot “fuller”, his side profile makes sense now, and he said he’d do it all over again without hesitation. I appreciated his enthusiasm toward his results. Even though recovery is terribly taxing, I guess it will be something I’m glad I went through when I get to see the final product!
Several people from my office walk to a nearby park for lunch on days when it’s warm out. Being in northern Alberta, we generally only get 2-3 months worth of these nice days per year, so we must take full advantage of each and every moment when they do show up. About 10 of us gathered around a picnic table and had a great time. My jaw is hurting a little bit from talking so much though, and my stomach is hurting from having to watch everybody eat their delicious subs and donairs.
“For customer service, press here.”
Let me take a moment to tell you about the Donair Nazi. He’s similar to the Soup Nazi from Seinfeld in that, when you walk into his shop, he tells you what you’re having for lunch (and not the other way around). I’ve heard many horror stories about people who asked for certain ingredients in their donair, only to be laughed out of the place. In fact, he has a mouse trap set up on the counter with a note on it that says, “For customer service, press here.” His wrath is worth it though, because the donairs he makes are to die for.
I had the privilege of slicing my finger open while cutting up strawberries for my smoothie last night. I’ve since learned that moving a knife through a soft piece of fruit and using your other hand as the cutting board is a bad idea. The kitchen never was my forte.
I leave you with a picture of one of the amazing feats I’ve accomplished at work thus far. Don’t get the wrong idea–I’m actually incredibly productive here. But sometimes your brain needs a rest, and while some people choose to go refill their coffee and others decide to hang out around the water cooler, I construct massive fortresses out of everyday materials. I figure that if I drink 3 cans of Ensure per day for 5 days each week, and I’m on a liquid diet for another 4 weeks, that’s 60 empty cans I’ll have at my disposal by the time I’m finished. Considering my current fortress is built from only 21 cans, I should end up with a structure 3x this size.
Mark your calendars for May 14. It’s going to be legendary. (Unless, of course, the custodial staff decide to ignore my “Do NOT recycle” note and throw all of my empty cans out.)